Thursday, 22 September 2016

Social Media

"The world itself is just a big hoax. Spamming with our running commentary of bullshit masquerading as insight, our social media faking as intimacy."
- Elliot Alderson (Mr. Robot)


We're at that age where everyone wants to be known as something. That age where 'curving your own name' has taken serious measures such as doing whatever it takes to get some time of attention and recognition from others. Everybody wants to be famous. This is, more or less true. Everybody wants to be known and they want to be a force to be reckoned with. Someone will post something and others will have something to say about that post.

Have you watched the USA's famous TV series Mr. Robot? I'm a huge fan of that show, one, because any person who finds an irony in the apparatchik way of living will appreciate the depiction of psychological vulnerability portrayed by the meritocratic characters encountered on the show, second, because it's about hacking and committing a cyber crime that can shut the world down!

What I have managed to decipher from this show is how we, humans, being social animals are so prone to the lures of power, attention and success (also how Esmail really nails down the psychology of us social animals and what a brilliant hacker he is!) I have gained tremendous consciousness and awareness to the society I belong to and I have developed this habit of reevaluating every action I take and the actions of others around me, well, that is, when the show really gets to me.

Anyway, I want to address the type of people who have caught my attention on the internet - on twitter, facebook, instagram, tumblr and yes, snapchat. There are all sorts of people in the world (LOL) and surprisingly, a lot of people have adapted a persona on the internet that is somehow chanelling the person they desire to be. Slowly, we have lost our way into this whirlpool of personas we are so busy creating online that we have forgotten how to develop our real personas in real life.

I'm seeing the youth being more superficial than ever before and that being said, I am at the prime of it. I see people worshiping material things and monetary assets rather than the good willed nature that other's portray (hey, the Kardashian are paving the way so it;'s easy to follow). I guess good ol' fashion proper education and good jobs no longer means anything when you can just earn money by posing for the camera. But the problem is, everyone is copying and following each other.

I can only fathom what type of society our children will be brought up in if this is the situation right now. We need to unwind the material-worshiping and start teaching moral values again. We need to engrave the ways of decency and value traits like honesty, loyalty and good will in our minds before we slowly vanish into this superficial world we're creating.

Thursday, 11 August 2016

Being straight forward

Throughout my life, I've never felt the need to sugar-coat things or tell people the stuff they want to hear so that they get assured of their 'make belief' confidence. Just like that, you're thinking, "What an asshole!" right?

Well, you've misconstrued. You see, I do give people compliments when they deserve it. The assurance such as "It'll be alright, trust yourself" or "Good luck, I hope it goes well" and to many females, "Wow, I love your outfit, it looks good on you". But one thing you need to know is that, I do not give these compliment to succumb to their liking. This is what boils down to it all. I am uncomfortable to the act of sucking up to people just to make them like me or see me as a 'nice' person. Generally, I am courteous. I like to smile to people I know. I am a sucker for pep-talks and small chats. Most introverts, I believe, fear me when I get inside an elevator with them. But sometimes there are those days when I have too much in my head, too much going on in there and so I switch to auto-pilot. I see, I feel, I recognize, but I'm on auto-pilot so that's as far as it goes.

This has been my life long struggle. I like to say things the way they are. I am not a person with an  ice cold heart. I just don't feel the need to be all chirpy, happy and sweet to everyone on a daily basis (some days you feel extra good so you feel like greeting everyone and everything). This has, I believe lead me into a new problem. This new problem relates to my personal hierarchy of the people in my life. The closest ones, the closer ones, the close ones, the cordial ones and the rest of them all. See, sometimes, people don't always get along. The closest of your friends may not get along with the close friends in your life. That's where this problem of mine exists. I hate making people deal with people they don't want to deal with just because I have some form of relationship with them. That is just me. I know a lot of people person reading this would go, "But it's bout you and who you want to hang out with that matters". Trust me I know. However, I've never really been strategic when it comes to friends (maybe that's why I hate Taylor Swift so much, well apart from the never ending victim card she always pull out, she is so strategic with people!) and this means if a higher hierarchic friend does not "vibe" with a lower hierarchic friend, then my immediate action is to distance the lower hierarchic friend. It's depressing to even type that shit out!!

I've always tried to find ways out of this bold straight-forwardness. But the fact that I'm an ENTP does not help. I love thriving on questioning people's intentions and trust me, everyone has an intention for taking the actions they take. I like figuring out what that is. It has helped me make friends whom I believe are to be the better or best of the options I'm presented with. It has even bit me back several times and yet, I still haven't learnt my lesson.

It's difficult to tone this down. I know I'm making it sound like it's a huge problem but it has it's perks. People like to ask me for my opinions because they know I will give them the honest opinion I can offer. I can state my opinion and bring an insight to people stuck with the same direction and of course this has backfired when I tell the ugly truth because that is NOT what anyone wants to hear when they ask you for an opinion (learnt that the hard way). But often times, I get misunderstood. That I'm just plain mean or an asshole. I am working on framing my sentences and opinions so that the receiver wouldn't feel so offended that they actually miss out the point. It's a working process...

After reading this, you're probably wondering if I have any emotions. Trust me, I am as sensitive and emotional as anyone can get. I cry one a weekly basis just because I need to. I have reality checks given to me by those that are closest to me. I always take them to heart and over analyze myself till I realize I am just as flawed as everyone so it's okay. At the end of the day, I am an honest, straight forward person who does not believe in sucking up to people just to gain something. I believe I will remain like this for the rest of my life and quite honestly, I wouldn't change that part of me; not for anyone. There's that part I am working on with how I convey things to people, but will I change the honesty and the ugly truth in the things I say? I'll leave that for you to decipher.

Wednesday, 18 May 2016

HALT

Temporary. I'm used to temporary things coming into my life. Constant moves, different friends. I forgot what it's like to actually keep people close to me. The same goes for relationships. I have learned that I'm not good with sharing any intimacy with another being solely on the fact that I've created a void in me.

You came, slowly you crept into my life. I was well aware. I knew that I had to have my guard up- they were up! Yet, you crept in, slowly. Everything I felt then, every bone shaking indulgence, every burning kiss and each peck you planted all over my body; I felt each one. But my guards were up and you didn't have the patience to see me put them down. So like always I drove you off because now, it's so easy for me to drive people away. You see, I know it's pointless to hold on when it's all heartache.

There were moments when I thought my soul and yours were one. But baby, those moments left along with my arched back and the sound of your moan.

Sunday, 13 March 2016

"And miles to go before I sleep"

This all-too-familiar phrase. Robert Frost would have never expected that someone could exploit this phrase from his poem, "Walking through the woods on a snowy evening".

I admit it, for some people who have never heard of his work (particularly this one) but do know me will associate this phrase with me immediately when they hear it. A major part of it has to do with the fact that I have this phrase tattooed on my right thigh.

My reason? Well, life has paved some unexpected curves for me to travel on and I bend through these curves, not knowing what to expect. I am always alarmed by the new circumstances that I stumble through each day. I meet potential lovers like a test that I never seem to pass...it never gets old and yes, I never learn. Except for those fields where I have to play my role as a supportive daughter. I have been practicing that role since I was 8. I know that role like it was programed in me. Despite having one more sister, that role is the only role I play all too well. But the rest? My role as a friend? As a lover? As a collegue or a familiar person you cross paths with everyday...well that will change. It will keep changing.


I know I still have a lot to learn. Everything keeps changing and so am I. I have a lot more changes to make and I know that things won't always be the way they are now. So yes, I still have miles to go before I sleep.

Monday, 7 March 2016

Bhutan


I don't think I need to emphasize much on what this post is going to be about (headnote: it's a pretty lengthy one) and I know I have been slacking off a bit from blogging because I had a break between my last post and this trip I'm posting about; then Christmas followed right after that and New Year immediately rang in after that! Before I knew it, college started and it was basically a whirlwind of tight schedules...so, without any further-a-due...

My circle here in college is pretty tight. There's just five of us and one of these 'best friends' of mine is from Thimphu, Bhutan. We all decided that, during these last two years of our five years course, we should all visit each other's hometowns. We planned this trip since summer 2015 and we were all so excited about it. I'm going to keep this post mainly on the perspective of a tourist BUT I will have to add some personal experiences that I had with my friend's family in The Land of the Thunder Dragon: Bhutan.

Let the pictures roll (LOL)

L to R: Snigdha, Dolma,Tlinpuii & yours truly
We took a 3rd AC Train from Sealdah, Kolkata to Hasimara. The journey was awful but we survived on pure excitement of our itinerary.

Apa Dorji (Dolma's dad) had his driver (Achu Jigme) pick us up from the station and he gave us a warm welcome. We entered Bhutan from the southern State of Phuentsholing, (which is the border state with India) where we stayed at Ashim Pemo's apartment for the night. Our first official evening in Bhutan was rather hectic as we had to get our passes from the Immigration Office. We managed to award ourselves with some confectioneries from Kizom's Cafe after that task was done. During our stay at Ashim Pemo's that night, we were introduced to great things such as Bhutan's strong vodka called Raven. Ashim Pemo also told us what we should expect from the trip and a few headnotes of what we might witness (like the penis drawings and souvenirs, the well-fed chubby street dogs, etc.) 

Raven
The next day, we drove uphill and upstate to Thimphu. There, Dolma's sister Omo and their father Apa Dorji greeted us warm-heatedly with home-made lunch. Let me tell you this before anything, BHUTANESE COUSIN IS AMAZING. We cleaned up, and then set out for a very special evening. Dolma and Omo were our tourist guides who took us to our first Dzong, Tashichho Dzong. Before entering the Dzong, we watched a very beautiful flag hoisting ceremony.

Bhutan's National flag (at à½–ཀྲ་ཤིས་ཆོས་རྫོང)
The Thunder Dragon (Druk) flies diagonally across the flag, dividing the flag into two prestigious colors: yellow and orange.
The soldiers carrying the flag
The beautiful flag hoisting ceremony


Omo at the entrance of the Dzong's Courtyard
The Dzong was beautiful! The murals on the walls were done in the ancient Bhutanese technique of mud painting. The Dzong inside was beautiful no less! Sadly, I can't show you pictures of it since there is a law which do not permit us to take pictures inside. However, out of respect, we still wouldn't have otherwise. From the prayer wheels to the courtyard and the entire ambiance with the sunset, everything was breathtaking. See for yourselves:

                                     

This is my favorite

Tlin :)

The courtyard from a corner view (notice the prayer wheels at the right corner)
                                      

From my personal experience, the best time to visit the Tashichho Dzong is in the evening. The flag hoisting ceremony and the sunset-lit courtyard will calm you inside.

A breath-taking view of the lighted Dzong

On our second day in Thimphu, we had to wake up early. Why? Because it was Bhutan's National Day and we were going to be in traditional attires called Kira (the men wear Go). That morning was freezing! It was winter season and the Sun wasn't up yet. We spent hours getting ready and then headed to Changlimithang Stadium. We were excited as foreigners from democratic countries to see the King. We've seen numerous pictures of him and heard of him and the Queen countless time. Sadly, what we didn't know was that the King was in another state, Paro and we could only hear his speech broadcast by Bhutan Broadcasting Service. (He sounded calm and soothing).

Selfie in Changlimithang (we were really early)
After the program, we met Apa Dorji who was sitting in the Official's pavilion. We then set off to Buddha Dordenma at Kuenselphodrang. The Bronze Buddha gilded in gold is one of Asia's biggest Buddha statue. The throne itself was huge and inside, hold thousands of mini-Buddhas.

Entrance

                 


Sassing with this sassy horse on the Throne of Buddha

                                                  

The view from the Dordenma (Point) was amazing. We could see Thimphu valley from there. After exploring all that we could, we headed up to Kuenslphodrang Park with our pizzas from The Season's (they have the best hot chocolate I have ever tasted).

If only I could rewind this and keep it on replay

The day ended with a visit to Takin Park. Takin is the national animal of Bhutan which is a hybrid of Yak and Goat. Sadly, the park was closed by the time we got there but we drove to the Northern side to get a glimpse of them from outside the fencing.

Sorry for the quality of this photo

The next day, we set off to Punakha State to visit the Punakha Dzong and this Dzong by far is my favorite Dzong. On the way we visited the Dochula Pass: 108 Stupas and since it snowed that morning, the serenity was beyond anything I have ever felt.

Dochula Pass

The entrance to the Temple at Dochula (model: Snigdha)

Druk Wangyel Cafe: A gift to the IV King from his second eldest wife

The cafe lobby

We reached Punakha Dzong after a few more hours of drive. The Punakha Dzong has this calmness inside and it was peaceful, leading it to my favorite Dzong.

The entrance

The Bridge



The peaceful Dzong's Courtyard.
Lunch that day: Different Datsi Dishes with traditional red rice

We drove back to Thimphu the same day and we cleaned up for a night out in town. Omo and Dolma took us to Space 34 where we met their friends. It was a fun night that lead to many private jokes.

                                   
The next day was for shopping and cafe hopping along with a very special visit to Dolma's Uncle (Apa Lympho, as we all referred to him). We first went to My Mart's cafe to drink some coffee and buy some confectioneries for Ama Pema (Apa Dorji's elder sister who is also Apa Limpho's wife) for inviting us for lunch. We then drove to our lunch venue and we were greeted warmly by Dolma's little niece Pemasel. She is the cutest four-year-old I have ever befriended. Apa Limpho was a minister during the Fourth King's rule and during that time, the country was still a Monarchy. We had a wonderful time there and my favorite part about this visit was Ama Pema's momos. I had around 20 of them and could barely eat the lunch they prepared. I had a terrible stomachache from that gluttonous indulgence later that day. After we left Apa Limpho's place, we set off into town for some shopping. I got some cool souvenirs for my mom (and yes, it was a carved Thunder Dragon because I am obsessed with it) and some clothing for my sister-in-law and my nephew. That evening, Apa Dorji took all of us out on a dinner treat at Le Meridien. We had a great time and though the day ended for me with terrible visits to the toilet, it was worth it.
at Apa Limpho's
with Apa Dorji
On the last second day of our trip (last for Snigdha) we went to Paro state where we went on a trek to Taktsang (popularly known as Tiger's Nest). This was my favorite part of the entire trip. We set off from the base of the mountain and from there it was a challenge!

Started from the bottom...


The trek from the bottom to the half-point took us almost an hour. Which was pretty amazing and we even passed all the other tourists on the trek up. I struggled a bit at the start because my lungs were getting hurt as I couldn't adjust my breath in the high altitude, let alone a cold winter high altitude air. Once I got my breathing right I became a mountain lion, just climbing and climbing.
Half point
It took us over 1 hour (close to two hours) to complete our trek from the bottom to the Monastery on top. The feeling of accomplishment was rewarding ourselves with the entire structure that was resting on the side of the mountain up there! The security was tight. We had to hand in our back-packs including our phones and all other gadgets. Inside, we visited each temple and gave our butter lamp offerings. I accomplished something epic there and it was entering the steep taktsang cave (or three tiger lairs) and inside it was a bit claustrophobic. So, according to the Buddhist belief, in the 8th Century, Guru Padmasambhava came here to mediate for three months, three weeks, three days and three hours. He was said to have arrived on a tiger. The cave was where the tiger was said to have rested.

...Now we're here
Rainbow across the waterfall next to the monastery. The bottom
was covered with snow and there were icicles everywhere.

After the trek, we were exhausted. We booked an Inn nearby and stayed there for the night. It was the last night we had together as Snigdha was leaving the next day. We were the only guests in that Inn so we got special services. The ladies working in  that hotel seemed like our age so we got along really well. That night, we treated ourselves to a hot stone mineral bath and it was divine! The day ended emotionally with all of us having a heart-to-heart talk. I love my girls :)

The next day we dropped Snigdha to Paro Airport. We then drove back to Thimphu, had lunch with Apa Dorji over a nice talk from him on what we should expect from life, because hello adulthood and responsibilities. I cherish every single advice you gave us Apa Dorji! After that, we packed and drove down to Phuentsholing where we stayed at Ashim Pemo's on our last night in Bhutan. Miss Universe 2015 was on that night and we hurled and laughed with the results.

The next morning, Aju Jigme drove us to Bagdogra Airport where Me and Tlin flew back to our home countries, India. The entire trip was amazing. Words don't come easy when people asked me later on on how my trip was. It was one trip that I will always look back to and reminisce all the fond memories, not only because Bhutan is a beautiful country, but because of the personal relationships I nurtured there.

Thank you for reading!