A positive mindset is always key to happiness. But its difficult to attain it when everything in your life is emitting negative vibes to you. The only way you can solve this problem is by eliminating the negativity from your life. Easier said tan done.
From past experiences, I know I am the kind of person who over thinks. That adds up in a negative way most of the time but sometimes, it helps me see situation clearer. However, the negative aspects of it tend to outweigh the positive.
It's always a question of balance isn't it? Whether this is better than that...it's always a question of choices. The same applies to what you let yourself be surrounded by. Of course we chose the people we associated with and we always have an affinity towards compatible personalities to ours. But, in my own experience it's very difficult to tell who is right in your life.
The key lies within you. Outweighing the positive from the negative all rests in how you choose to associate yourself with certain people and how you let them treat you. I am going to write here, the things that I have learn solely based on my experience.
Friendship:
Before I get into this, I want to take an example of Sex and The City. Carry, Samantha, Charlotte and Miranda- all women have different personalities, They have common interests are similar but their dynamo can sometimes be very different (especially with Samantha and Charlotte). But what makes them good friends is acceptance. Accepting the kind of person each one is. In my opinion that is the key to friendship.
I have dealt with so many friendship dramas growing up. When you were little your interest are pretty much the same but once you start hitting puberty, it changes! Some are more focused on their studies, some become really incline towards the opposite sex, some get into sports and others just enjoy life as it is. It is true that cliques do exist beyond the screens of movies and tv shows. You always tend to 'hang' with the people you always have common interest with. But within the group, everyone must learn how to respect each other.
Its is so important to respect your friends. Whether you hold their dirty little secrets or know their insecurities, never call them out nor talk to them in a disrespectful manner whenever you want to! That's the first rule in friendship.
People change even in a span of two three years. Your mission as a friend is to learn how to accept the change in that person if your genuinely value their friendship! Never talk issh about your friends to your other friends or anyone for that matter!
I have been through a certain situation where a particular friend had these moods where she simply just could not tolerate me. God forbids if she had any solid reasons why because when the mood fluctuation stopped, it was like we're good friends again. Sometimes you have a glue in your friendship, That one person that makes everyone get along. What you must realise is that even without such person your should be able to 'chill' with the other friends.
Never let a friend disrespect you out of differences. Your opinions may not be the same and you may have very different interest as it can happen sometimes. Make sure you never let the negativity of such person get to you. It was always hard for me to shake it off when a friend would seem upset with me and I didn't know why. Truth is you can always confront them alone. Ask them why they're acting weird and if they have such hostility towards you. That the key to maintaining a close friendship. But if its with a friends you're not so close with or the friends doesn't like talking about these matters, learn how to not let it get to you. Give yourself a break from that person. It will help your friendship in the long run!
Relationships:
Here, I am talking about the relationship you have with your significant other, Every relationship has their own nature. Some are really dramatic with intense feelings while others are chilled and laid back. But regardless of the type of relationship you are in always remember that you must never put yourself through things you do not want nor believe in because you 'love' the other person or you 'don't want to lose them'. In the long run, selflessness is just a fantasy and you will put yourself down and unhappy. The negativity will slowly consume you and when you're spat out, you'll be nothing but a ball of no dignity nor self respect.
Relationships have the strongest tendency to do this to people. Remember to love yourself before you decide to love someone else. I'm not sure if you remember that quote form that book "The Perks of being a wall flower": We choose the love we think we deserve...remember that? It cannot be further emphasized because you chose the person you want to be with and how they behave with you or treat you depends on how you let them. Never feel powerless to state your opinion or what makes you comfortable in a relationship. Likewise, never forget to listen to the opinion of your significant other. It's a two way process of negotiation and acceptance.
These are all I have to write this time. I know these are not adequate because every situation is different form the other. The key ingredient here is to always love yourself so that others may l;ern to love you and respect you. Do not waste your time pondering with negativity and always go for the more positive approach. Live life and love plenty.
xoxo
It's always a question of balance isn't it? Whether this is better than that...it's always a question of choices. The same applies to what you let yourself be surrounded by. Of course we chose the people we associated with and we always have an affinity towards compatible personalities to ours. But, in my own experience it's very difficult to tell who is right in your life.
The key lies within you. Outweighing the positive from the negative all rests in how you choose to associate yourself with certain people and how you let them treat you. I am going to write here, the things that I have learn solely based on my experience.
Friendship:
Before I get into this, I want to take an example of Sex and The City. Carry, Samantha, Charlotte and Miranda- all women have different personalities, They have common interests are similar but their dynamo can sometimes be very different (especially with Samantha and Charlotte). But what makes them good friends is acceptance. Accepting the kind of person each one is. In my opinion that is the key to friendship.
I have dealt with so many friendship dramas growing up. When you were little your interest are pretty much the same but once you start hitting puberty, it changes! Some are more focused on their studies, some become really incline towards the opposite sex, some get into sports and others just enjoy life as it is. It is true that cliques do exist beyond the screens of movies and tv shows. You always tend to 'hang' with the people you always have common interest with. But within the group, everyone must learn how to respect each other.
Its is so important to respect your friends. Whether you hold their dirty little secrets or know their insecurities, never call them out nor talk to them in a disrespectful manner whenever you want to! That's the first rule in friendship.
People change even in a span of two three years. Your mission as a friend is to learn how to accept the change in that person if your genuinely value their friendship! Never talk issh about your friends to your other friends or anyone for that matter!
I have been through a certain situation where a particular friend had these moods where she simply just could not tolerate me. God forbids if she had any solid reasons why because when the mood fluctuation stopped, it was like we're good friends again. Sometimes you have a glue in your friendship, That one person that makes everyone get along. What you must realise is that even without such person your should be able to 'chill' with the other friends.
Never let a friend disrespect you out of differences. Your opinions may not be the same and you may have very different interest as it can happen sometimes. Make sure you never let the negativity of such person get to you. It was always hard for me to shake it off when a friend would seem upset with me and I didn't know why. Truth is you can always confront them alone. Ask them why they're acting weird and if they have such hostility towards you. That the key to maintaining a close friendship. But if its with a friends you're not so close with or the friends doesn't like talking about these matters, learn how to not let it get to you. Give yourself a break from that person. It will help your friendship in the long run!
Relationships:
Here, I am talking about the relationship you have with your significant other, Every relationship has their own nature. Some are really dramatic with intense feelings while others are chilled and laid back. But regardless of the type of relationship you are in always remember that you must never put yourself through things you do not want nor believe in because you 'love' the other person or you 'don't want to lose them'. In the long run, selflessness is just a fantasy and you will put yourself down and unhappy. The negativity will slowly consume you and when you're spat out, you'll be nothing but a ball of no dignity nor self respect.
Relationships have the strongest tendency to do this to people. Remember to love yourself before you decide to love someone else. I'm not sure if you remember that quote form that book "The Perks of being a wall flower": We choose the love we think we deserve...remember that? It cannot be further emphasized because you chose the person you want to be with and how they behave with you or treat you depends on how you let them. Never feel powerless to state your opinion or what makes you comfortable in a relationship. Likewise, never forget to listen to the opinion of your significant other. It's a two way process of negotiation and acceptance.
These are all I have to write this time. I know these are not adequate because every situation is different form the other. The key ingredient here is to always love yourself so that others may l;ern to love you and respect you. Do not waste your time pondering with negativity and always go for the more positive approach. Live life and love plenty.
xoxo
touché
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